Future Top 10 Flashback: April 12, 2014 – The Billboard Hot 100

Standard

Originally written April 5, 2014.

All right, you asked for it.  Want my take on the current hits?  Here’s the top 10 from the Billboard Hot 100.  I will actually listen to these, or at least as much as I can stomach.  The cover dates are a week in advance, so survey dated April 12, 2014.

Be careful what you wish for!

#10:
Turn Down For What – DJ Snake & Lil’ Jon

Welcome to 10 years ago.  Jesus Christ, will the rap genre ever move forward?  I wasn’t exactly expecting deep, meaningful lyrics from Lil’ Jon, but I did expect, um, something there.  Some of you might like the video.

#9:
OneRepublic – Counting Stars

Hmmm, an actual song.  How novel.  Not much of a melody there, huh?  The song’s too long for what it is.

#8:
Aloe Blacc – The Man

Wow, check out how deep and soulful he’s trying to be.  They did give a songwriting credit to Elton John & Bernie Taupin for obvious reasons.  I like the ’72-’73 Chrysler Newport and the ’66 Dodge police car.

#7:
Lorde – Team

Finally, a followup single.  Or did I miss one?  I was wondering if she was going to become the next Carly Rae Jepsen – one and done.  It’s no “Royals,” but that was lightning in a bottle.  Ain’t gonna catch it again.

#6:
Bastille – Pompeii

Amazing.  The singer’s not using Autotune, but sounds like it.  Again, lots of production stuff there to cover up a simplistic melody.

#5:
Idina Menzel – Let It Go

From Disney’s “Frozen,” this won the Oscar for Best Song.  Would it be here if it hadn’t?

#4:
Jason Derulo feat. 2 Chainz – Talk Dirty

Have you heard a hip-hop song or watched a hip-hop video in the past fifteen years?  Then you’ve heard and seen this one.  It’s amazing how this genre has survived pumping out the same shit for so long.

#3:
Katy Perry feat. Juicy J – Dark Horse

So now she’s Cleopatra.  Exactly what am I supposed to like about this?

#2:
John Legend – All Of Me

I have some respect for John Legend because he actually plays the piano.  Does that show how far we’ve fallen?  I did like his performance of “Let It Be” with Alicia Keys on the recent Beatles special, even though they both oversung it a bit.

All right, the number one song in the land according to the bible, Billboard magazine, is:

An Oscar nominee from “Despicable Me 2.”  I can understand why it’s so popular – I kinda like it myself.

Save this thread and repost it 15 years from now.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s